2 Tips To Feel Better If Your Boyfriend Ignores You
I know how it feels awful when you have to admit, “I think my boyfriend is ignoring me.”
Especially if you just reached out to your boyfriend with a text or call and he not only doesn’t answer immediately, he doesn’t respond even an hour or more later.
It comes off as though he’s flat out ignoring you.
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Let’s go back.
All is well, and you decide you just want to hear his voice.
For a moment, you think, “Maybe I shouldn’t call him. Maybe I should wait.”
Then you get those thoughts of “But I’m a modern woman—no harm in me calling first.”
So off you go…almost so quickly you can’t stop yourself.
You’re feeling Cosmo magazine bold.
You call him.
A couple of rings and then his voice mail greeting starts.
You leave a message. You try to sound lighthearted.
Not silence. Death silence.
Do you start beating yourself up in the boxing ring called: WHY DID I THINK IT WAS A GOOD IDEA TO CALL HIM?
Since he’s not there, (of course), you box yourself for a few quick rounds of:
…with a few upper cuts of “I know better,”
…to finish it off with the knockout punch of “this always happens to me!”
With head hanging low in feelings of embarrassment, shame, and heart-blood oozing, you stumble out of the ring donning the robe of “Whatever. I’m cool. Doesn’t matter.”
Of course, it does matter.
He’s your boyfriend or soon to be the boyfriend, and he’s not answering your call, and he’s ignoring your voice message.
You feel the ache of the death silence throughout your entire being.
It feels so very frustrating when you want to make contact with the guy you more than like in person, to get a high off of that connection, and yet he never seems to have the time or the inclination to return your calls or texts.
Instead of beating yourself up, you start to conjure up and daydream of punishments to teach him a lesson to NEVER IGNORE YOU AGAIN.
And I know you can be creative. Ingrained in you as a young child is “punishment creativity.”
Don’t believe me?
Watch my coaching video where in the middle of the video is a 6-year-old girl who uses her creativity to devise highly inventive ways to punish a guy who doesn’t call his girlfriend back an indicator of our societal conditioning early on. Click here.
What if you could instead feel fantastic instead of those moments of desperation and urgency and…maybe bring him closer even if he’s on the other side of town?
Wouldn’t that feel refreshing?
Walk with me to the pool where you are loved…
Society teaches us females the worst strategies for dealing with life, with men, with ourselves.
Anything you’ve done heretofore that felt poopy in the aftermath is simply from you being a good student of life and picking up the junk-ish strategies.
Like calling or texting a guy. Guys don’t like it.
He may tolerate it, making you assume he likes it, but he doesn’t really.
He will distance himself when you pursue him, or, he will use you for a booty call, and then distance. It doesn’t matter what he says. It matters what he does.
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How were you to know that calling him could have such bad results?? You couldn’t.
Your guy wants you to hang back and just be living your lovely life so that there is this energetic space around you that invites him to come near. That space of being warm yet into your life more than into his life invites him to show up and be a boyfriend and do his boyfriend duties such as call you.
The second you break that space by going towards him with a phone call or text or stop-by, he gets a little afraid and takes a big step to distance himself so that he has space to try to figure out how he can regain his boyfriend duties.
Think of it this way: pretend you live on the 2nd floor of some lovely building and he is walking down your street thinking of coming to see you. He’s trying to decide.
Which is more inviting to him? Your window open and you leaning out the window waving at him and calling out his name, “Billy, up here! It’s me!” or your window open and he can sense that warm, comfy you are in there doing some thing that delights you? Without even seeing you, he will pick up that energy of the second scenario in the Law of Romance and push your doorbell. The first scenario with you flagging him down keeps him walking.
Once you flag him down or call him, even if it seems “every woman is doing the same thing,” you are left covered with poopy-strategy-residue. You feel terrible, wish you could get your boyfriend to stop ignoring you, etc.
Let’s clean off all of that yuck for you and him.
Tip #1: Right now, step into a shower.
“Uh, Christine. I’m at work. You want me to go get in the shower?”
Step into an imaginary shower.
Do this…it’s powerful.
It is a dry shower with sun rays beaming in from above and airy crystals that reflect rainbows of color streaming out of the shower-head.
The crystals don’t make contact with your body, but they magnetize and remove the negative thoughts, impulsive urges to connect with him first, need to control him, need to have the relationship your way on your time table, and need to make him respond.
Let the delicate crystals magnetize and pull out all those yucky strategies I just listed that make your man ignore you and wash them down the drain.
These energy exercises do work. Your mind will disagree, but your mind’s urgencies are part of the problem for you right now.
Those were the default strategies that society handed you.
They never, ever work with a masculine man in romance.
That’s the distinction. In romance.
Do you know what he’s thinking?
He thinks he is the masculine man and he’ll decide when it’s time to reach out to you, so why is a woman (his girl) taking his job and ringing/texting him?
So you took the crystal shower to remove the yucky go-to strategies.
You may feel hopeless like he’ll never reach out to you if you don’t reach out to him.
That’s defective thinking. The opposite is true.
He needs your warm and inviting space that you energetically create around you to feel inspired to pull out his boyfriend ninja moves.
Let’s create that space around you. Keep reading.
Tip #2: Let’s get in the Pool Where You Are Always Loved.
The water is your perfect temperature. It feels loving and liquid and surrounds and caresses every part of you.
There’s no struggle to keep from drowning. It’s a unique pool.
You can move through it like an astronaut in outer space. You are suspended yet you feel the warm liquid all around you.
You feel safe. You feel free. You can float or move without effort.
You can breathe.
Your mind is calm. You have no racing thoughts. Or thoughts of your guy.
You are not waiting for him. See my thought on this topic here.
It feels so good to feel this love caressing you.
A woman with high boyfriend appeal enjoys feeling caressed by love even when her guy isn’t present.
She gets in that pool when she needs to feel love and connect with her feminine self to avoid any buried urge to call the guy.
And if you are near an actual body of water, get near it or in it.
Water has an amazing soothing quality for us when we feel out of love with ourselves and this article may be interesting.
You’re smart. You choose to save yourself from any guaranteed heartbreak.
Because it’s his boyfriend job to call you and your job to create a warm feeling space around you to up your boyfriend appeal. That warm and inviting energy is what he seeks.
The benefit of taking care of you first, is the guy thinks you are instantly intriguing. Tweet this.
And when you are intriguing, the alpha man will come calling.
Your take away here is this: in romance, doing almost nothing but feel the great love in you and around you will create the safe space for him to come close to you. That is having Boyfriend Appeal!
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How about you? Has your guy done the slow fade after you called him? Comment below.
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